Posted by: The Saffa Mom | February 17, 2011

Yes, let’s agree- that was my Valentine’s present.

Today is a day for venting- I can feel it! It’s in my nose, my sinuses and in my throat!!! (Partly because I am suffering from a post nasal drip.)

Last night I was so irritated- so irritated! I think talking to you all about it ALWAYS seems to help.

Valentines Day (yes, the day I got “nothing” from my knight), I had to drive my knight to the airport to get on a plane to Cape Town for work.  He absolutely loves Cape Town, and if he could- he would move tomorrow. I, on the other hand, am so happy where we are. I love my little life… well, most of it. I don’t want to pack up and move. Moving to Cape Town, would mean that you may as well  move “overseas”. (Sunshine- that was especially for you.)

If any of you have read my *and the name page* page, you would realise that the few days ahead…. would be well appreciated. My knight was due to come back on Friday, and I was going to have a few nights all to myself. (Well, once my Princess was put to bed.) No cooking!! No worrying about whether we have food in the house!! No noise on the TV when I am trying to read!! NO moaning about how long I have taken to shower and get ready for bed!! Just me. I love “just me” time. Yah- just me time until Friday!

(Let’s just clarify before this all goes pear shaped…. I do love my knight! )

My big plan all went in a very different direction. It was no longer my plan.

Wednesday morning My Knight calls, he is trying to get a flight back today. “What time is going to be best for you to fetch me from the airport?”

Huh???? Why???

“I miss you too much!”


(Let’s just REALLY make sure we are clear- I do love my knight!!)

“Don’t you miss me?”

 Of course.

Day continues. Flight arrives. I fetch my Knight from the airport. Drop him off at his car. He goes home to work, as “no one” knows that he is home…. at least he won’t be bothered.

Day continues. Receive a call at 16:30, “what time are you coming home?”

Will leave just now?

“When is just now.”

My love, I will leave in a few minutes. I am just trying to finish up on something.

“Fine. ”

MAYBE he has surprised me with dinner? Just maybe. (Whatever!!)

Fetch My Princess, and now need to get home- because surprise, surprise- I have to cook. I have to “freaking damn well” cook!

Please understand that cooking has become somewhat of a chore in my house…. the reasons why go something like this:

–          What are you making for dinner? (Does it really matter? Is this because you would like to get in with your hands and actually help? Or is this because you are starving and would like to try and judge how long it will take me to get a plate of food out?)

–          Are you putting that in my food? (This generally takes place as soon as he sees something that green or veg like. Or fresh herbs.)

–          Can you just cook mine separately, and carry on cooking yours the way you want it? (WTF? No, why must I cook three different meals in this house? I cannot cook your chicken and then not add everything else- it will taste terrible, and you will think I am a bad cook!)  

–          Please don’t put those in the food? (Anything green, veg-like or in fact anything that seems to have grown out of the earth.)

–          No, I don’t want veg. You know I don’t eat veg, so just don’t cook it for me. (Just don’t? How are we going to sit around a table and tell children one day that they need to eat their vegetables because they have soldiers inside of them, but the head of the table just point blank refuses?)  

–          Why can’t you just cook the same thing every week? (Because I get bored!!! And if you are not careful, I will get bored with you soon too!)

–          Please don’t experiment. (Might start experimenting with some brooklax!! Oh wait- can’t do that. It will be blamed on the food. Bad cook?)

–          I don’t eat that. (But you have never even tasted it.) Well, I don’t eat it. (Well, just freaking eat it!!!) There are things you don’t eat. (Like what?)    

You get my drift…..

So, get home, upstairs, shoes off, and my knight is lying on our bed- laptop on. Kiss, kiss. Quick two minute conversation…. because surprise, surprise….. I have to go downstairs and cook. (I am convinced that knight will duly follow, and we can have a nice catch up in the kitchen. Perhaps open a bottle of wine?)

BUT …. NO!!!!

I end up cooking the entire meal, bitching and moaning in this little noggin of mine.

My knight arrives… at this point I am just waiting for the rice to be done.

“Can I help?”

No you can’t. You may as well have stayed in Cape Town my love. Then at least I would not have had to cook. (Tone of irritation.)

“I have been working my love.”

Well, you could have worked in Cape Town.

“Would you like me to go back upstairs?”

Well, yes, everything has been done.

And off his strolls. (That is some of the female jargon that men just don’t get! Where are you going?)

Finish off dinner, still moaning and bitching in this little noggin of mine.

“My love!!!” I yell this from the kitchen. Why? Well, because I refuse to walk upstairs to tell My Knight that the meal I just slaved over is ready. The fact is that if I call, you need to come. I am not calling to ask you how you are? I am not calling you to have a conversation from two different levels in our home. I am not calling for any other reason but that you better come!

“Yes my love.”

Man!!! Stuff this. I dish up my own plate and move to the lounge and start eating. Nothing grates me more than getting everything that makes up a meal- ready at the same time, to stay warm for the same amount of time, to eat together- same time….. and then you take 15 minutes to find your way to the kitchen.

I eat.

The evening did not get better. In fact, my knight brought his lap top downstairs…. ate and continued to “work”. Sure, missed me a whole bunch!

Starting to feel a little better………..thanks for listening!

At least I had my Blackberry and my Kindle!!! (Even though the TV was on in the background.)   

Before I forget……. somewhere in the early evening, my knight commented on a Valentine that I had received. Yes, i received a Valentine! From someone else!! (It came from my business partner, but I told my knight I was not entirely sure. *wink, wink*.) My first reaction was to move in the direction of stating that he did not give me a Valentine. Not even a note.  My love of my life, my partner- did not give me a Valentine, and we were not even married? This was the best.. wait… here it comes….. suddenly he pipes up and says the U2 concert was my Valentine present. Bwaaaaahhhhhhhh. (He did not pay for our tickets, he managed to get them through work. I would have paid for tickets if he had not have come right. And I very specifically stated this before he said “don’t worry, I will arrange.” This took place months before. He never even clicked that it would be the day before Valentine’s day!)

Yes my love, let’s agree- the U2 concert was my Valentine’s present!  

I am off to the spa this afternoon, to spend my real Valentine’s present from my real Valentine! Will be sure to “really” enjoy it! I am convinced they will still serve me heart shaped chocolates, and read poetry while i am pampered.

Maybe i will come home to a cooked meal, and a glass of wine?Maybe.  Just maybe.




  1. Oooooohhhhhh honey…..that was so close to my heart …. And there is NO excuse for not getting a valentine … None

    • I am sure it was close to many hearts my friend.

  2. Sorry, you didn’t get a Valentine… so here’s a poem I wrote for you and all the ladies out there. It’s kinda lame, but hey it’s too early here still and I haven’t had enough coffee yet!

    Roses are red.
    Violets are blue.
    Even though you didn’t’ get a valentine.
    Doesn’t mean you should stew.

    ‘Cause even though us guys ALWAYS goof up Valentine’s day.
    Doesn’t mean that we don’t love you!
    It’s just that we aren’t the brightest lot.
    And often we don’t always think through.

    And sometimes the things that we say and do.
    Makes you ladies want to perform kung fu.
    And even though we may not show our appreciation.
    When you’re cooking us Cordon Bleu.

    Somewhere deep in our blank stares.
    Just know that we won’t be untrue.
    And when push comes to shove if ever need be.
    We would jump in front of a train for you.

    So let it all out to your blogging friends.
    Because we are all here for you.
    And reading your entertaining blog posts everyday.
    Makes us all wanna say WOO HOO!

    Happy Valentines Day!

    • You are too precious!!!
      Time for that children’s book!

  3. I actually thought about you this week. My valentine gave me a Kindle! It reminded me of your previous post. 🙂

    • What an awesoem Valentine’s present! What do you get for your birthday…. perhaps an IPAD? Haha.
      Are you enjoying it?
      I am…. although i am only about 40% (for all the non kindle users- it tells you this) through. Reading a brilliant book. Three Seconds.
      Have you downloaded some books?

  4. Bokkie you need to be more direct like I am to Mr. Bricks.

    Nice blog today, despite all the crap you went through.



    • More direct- I am teh queen of direct. At times, completely tactless. Perhaps my knight thinks i am joking?
      Let’s see how he makes it up. Going to Cape Town for a week on Sunday.

  5. ah well……….

    he brought himself home as your valentine’s?

    • Let’s agree to that then.
      He may agree with you there too.

  6. Sorry, but let me take this from his point?
    Okay you were anticipating time to yourself and didn’t get it.
    He didn’t know that and he wanted to come home because he missed you and he hoped you missed him. He said so and asked you.
    So what was your attitude to that? Did he pick up on something, that then shall I say maybe discouraged him? Then he, maybe without saying it, really wonders why he came home in the first place?
    I know I don’t have the whole story and am trying to read thoughts from your words. But kinda going on my own experiences with my better half, which she is, I will admit that.
    Please don’t filet me too bad.
    I do miss you when you miss a day or two of blogs. I wonder what’s up?
    Come to my blog and tell me what you want. I will make you something to keep our blogship smooth. Is that a bribe? Maybe!? 🙂

    • My dear Harold- this was a venting session for me….. not a councilling session? Haha. You are completely right however….. but i still dont think he came home because he missed me.
      Come to your blog and tell you what i want? Over my head???? Will be there though right now?
      OUr blogship is smooth- isnt it?

  7. It never pays to “irritate the cook” and a smart man knows that. I am sorry your special day did not work out. This is why I always say “He who expects nothing is seldom disappointed.”

    By the way, the day after Valentines I went by the card store and guess what? All the cards for women or the wife, were gone. Totally emptied out.

    Now the cards for the guys … More than enough of them to go around, hardly touched.

    What does that tell you my dear?

    I am sure that if you cooked it that it would be just great, never mind the flack, just be the you that you are meant to be.


    • Don- perhaps you think he will eat anything i put in front of him…. but i have watched him pick out half a meal before, and the thought of wasting so much good food breaks my heart.
      HOWEVER- BOYS- comment for all of you……. go out now and get a valentine’s day card which is probably on sale. Then you dont have to worry next year. Buy a few so you all stocked up. Don knows exactly which shops to go to.

  8. Firm, clear, expectations work wonders.

    • Mmmmmm, I thought i was quite clear and firm. Perhaps i need some help in that department. The fact is- who really wanst to be a nag?
      So instead- i will nag to you.

  9. Ai tog, men!

    • All the same. Haha. (Will perhaps get some stick for that boys?)

  10. Coincidence? Today mine said :don’t use pepper on my steak! Who eats steak, something of a luxury these days, without a little pepper???? And he ate over 3/4 of it, thanks – now what am I supposed to prepare for dinner now that the entire freakin steak is gone… hot dogs it is!

    • Doesn’t eat pepper? haha.
      I am sure he doesn’t even worry over what you are going to do for dinner- because you will do something! Right!

      • Yah, I’m always tinkering in the kitchen, he’s also anti-carb. It’s sort of ironic tho, he’s from here (Tex Mex, spicy, hot!) and I’m from Canada (not exactly known for spicy food) and our tastes are for eachother’s homeland foods. Meant to be together I guess 🙂

        • Well anti carb is good!!! But anti veg is not so good.
          Does he not enjoy the spicy food? X

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