Posted by: The Saffa Mom | January 12, 2011

That’s snot funny!

I was going to do a post today on something that I have been mulling over for some time. It was all sparked by a comment that was made by me to my knight over the weekend…….BUT let’s leave it for tomorrow!!! (So do come back.) The reason why we are leaving it for tomorrow is because this morning I was absolutely bowled over by something else….

I share an office with one of my Partner’s other businesses. Our business is still a “start-up” and not yet making money, and therefore sharing resources is a cost-effective management strategy. It also means that everyday I have a few happy social moments in an open planned office, in which everyone knows everything. I try to be quite hush-hush, but every now and then when I am reading one of your blogs, I just cant help myself from giggling.

We don’t only share an office- the 10 of us also share one, yes one, bathroom. In fact, you can’t really call it a bathroom. It is a cubicle. (The door has to even fold in half when you open it, as there is not enough space between the door and the toilet seat! It is one of the sole reasons why I have stopped drinking water at the office. My knight has preached some hogwash that if you “need to pee” at least every 45- 60 minutes, you are healthy and drinking enough water? Ummmmmmmmmmmm.  ???? If you body needed that much water, does it make sense that it would leave your body as quickly as it entered?  Constant debate in our home. (You see- my knight thinks he is a Doctor in disguise.)

I have come out of that cubicle so many times and wanted to sit down and start a post. And then stopped and thought, do you really want to hear my thoughts on smelly toilets? Do you want me to question why people can’t just go for a drive home to do their number 2? Or why they always buy the pot-pourri toilet spray, that really makes everything so so so so so much worse. Do you want to know that I sit at my desk and wonder who was last in the bathroom, so that they next time I go, I make sure that it is definitely not after them!

I come back to earth, and realise that would not be a good post.  

However, today I just had to. (I am sorry…once it is out of my system it is gone, you never have to read about it again.)

So this morning, I am sitting have a whizz on the toilet, and my eyes glance around and suddenly stop on something. (Much higher than my head.) It looks like it could be silicone, or glue that has landed on the wall, tailing down and ending in a massive drop-like ball. You know what I am trying to describe? How quickly the silicone runs until it starts drying. I then wonder how did that get there? We havent done any repair work in here? My office is filled with conveyancing secretary’s and conveyancers, I doubt they would have been busy with silicone in our little cubicle?

I wipe and pull my trousers up and button. Then I look more closely….. in fact, this resembles snot! “Oh my gosh! Is that snot? Who, what, how? I really think it is snot!” Do I leave it? I can’t. I am so scared that the next time I try to squeeze in, my shirt wipes up against it and it then ends up on my clothes….. Can you imagine? Someone else’s snot on my work shirt?

The biggest debate in my house at the moment is the handkerchief is. My knight thinks  that there is nothing unhealthy about it. To open it up blow in it, fold it nicely and put it back into your pocket is not unhealthy??? I, and I am sure you have already gathered by my tone, think it a cesspool of germs, and am completely disgusted by the notion. One day (recently) he actually packed a hand towel into the car, and I said “what is that for?” He responded: “my nose. My sinuses are very bad at the moment!” I almost threw up there and then. Realising my absolute disgust, he then asked, “would you prefer that I use a roll of toilet paper?” “Ummmm, yes, most certainly!!!” (I feel nauseous just thinking about it.) This morning my knight accused me of throwing away all his hankies….. I havent, but I think now that I have been accused of it, I may as well.  

So back to story….. I gather some toilet paper, roll into a nice ball and wipe the wall. All this time I am hoping that it is rock hard, as that would than confirm my earlier suspicion of this excrement actually being glue or silicone. 

No luck there! It was gooey and soft and it wiped off the wall. With ease. Urghhhhhhhhhh!!!! 

Can anyone explain to me WTF???

Let me end my post on a “cleaner, healthier more appetising” note.

Yesterday afternoon I found a frog in the house, again! With all the rain, and in the country it has become quite common. My knight will not touch them….. BUT he will walk around all day with a snot filled material wipe stuck in his pocket? (Can you see a common thread- because I cant).

While trying not to hurt it, but still get it out, it hopped into a corner where one of the my knight’s German Shephards was lying. Up she got and scooted- she knew I was in for the kill, and she was not going to take me on. 

I took a couple of photo’s to show Princess, and thought I would post them with this bit about snot. (The feeling of a frog, and snot may be comparable? Or would that be a snail?)  

  

An explanation of the photo taken:

The frog no clue. But he acted dead!!!

The dog hair that came up with him is one of the reasons why I am not rushing to get another dog. Ever! Or at least NOT a German Shephard. That is a problem in our home as my knight is the MOST stubborn person in the world, (second to me), and he ONLY wants German Shephards.

 The black nails were a rebel move a few days ago, my knight dislikes them intensely. (I think they looked awesome with my black suit and red shirt that I wore on monday, but not so great with eth cream, beige and maroon skirt I wore yesterday. Today is a grey and white shirt with black pants, and they do look hot!)

Looks tiny there. When he realised that I had put him out, and that freedom had been presented, he hopped off.

I only wish that snot could do that!  

  

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Responses

  1. You are a brave bokkie to handle a frog. It took me many years to get rid of warts as a child and I will not touch a frog. We won’t get into the snot part of your story, that is gross. I bet the “toilet in a box” is unisex…..!
    CHX

    • My knight says the same thing, however i do not think that warts come from frogs. Otherwise, i would have turned into a witch by now.
      The snot part was terribly disgusting. I am still looking around the office wandering who it could have been!
      And yes, totally correct- the toilet is uni-sex….. However we only have one gentlemen here ALL the time, and he arrives closer to lunch time! Which leaves me dumbstruck at times.
      xx

  2. Good Lord, you touched a frog and foreign snot. *faints*
    Tell your man that German Shepherds aggravate sinus trouble.

    • Not with my hands…. well not the snot!
      Haha…. that is another debate in our home. Apparently their hair is way to long to aggravate his sinuses! It is the short haired dogs and cats that make it worse. (Apparently!!) And we cant get any- to test the theory!
      xx

  3. Eeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
    😀

  4. You know…I am in agree-ance with the too much water (I don’t like the taste of water and lord knows I won’t drink a lot!) and the black nails look divine!

    I have a pixie hair cut and every man I know dislikes it, but my gal pals think it’s cute. In regards to your nails–I have a secret! Do what you like because other people’s opinions don’t really matter! 😉

    Have a great day Pally-McNally!

    xoxo
    CatMan

    • Pally McNally? Over my head there….haha. Clearly all the “slime” has gotten to this brain.
      Thanks for the tip!
      A pixie hair cut- that must be awesome!
      xx

  5. 3 things…

    1. Personally, I think posts about toilet humor are great! That’s the 10 year old that still inhabits part of my psyche.

    2. I’m not a doctor here (nor a farmer!), but warts do not come from frogs, they are caused by viruses.

    3. With all due respect to the Knight… putting a snot filled rag into your pocket, pulling it back out, unfolding it to find a clean spot, putting it back into your pocket… that’s NASTY!

    • 3 things back…..
      1. Perhaps i will find some more toilet humour in the not so distant future… (I am sure everyone is already cringing!)
      2. Thanks for the confirmation there….. that TOO is a constant debate in my home.
      3. My knight knows I have a blog, but he does not know what it is called…… so i dont think he has managed to track it down yet. However, i do think that he does try. I have tried to get him to realize- that it is MINE, and i want it to stay MINE. But perhaps if he ever finds it- he will be able to take everyone’s tips and comments to heart!
      xx

  6. Bbbbwwwwhhhhhahahahhahahaha – that is so eeekie….

    • More than eeeekiee…. i still wretch everytime i think about it!
      xx

  7. EEEW! Oh my goodness that is so disgusting! I totally agree with you on the hankie thing – just use a kleenex and throw it away!! No need to keep a snot filled cloth IN YOUR POCKET! However, I think that German Shepherds are wonderful dogs. 😉 You just have to get over the hair.

    -Tia

    http://www.tiallarising.wordpress.com

    • Yes- agree- totally disgusting!
      German Shephards are wonderful dogs, they also however very loyal to ONE person. I think that they have selective hearing- clearly very clever. They ignore me point blank.. except when i have food. Sounds a little like some of the kids out there. The hair however is DIFFICULT To get over….. I think that with the amount of hair that they shed- they should actually be bald already!
      xx

  8. Eeeuuuww. But I’m glad you’ve got that out of your system, so to speak!
    I look forward to tomorrow’s post 🙂
    Sunshine xx

    • Thaks Sunshine. Happy to have you back!!!!
      xx

  9. Mr. Bricks also uses a hanky that he folds up and puts into his pocket after each use. That’s why he snot touching me! Just Sayin’

    Good post – keep it up! Your black nails story could have been an entirely separate post, complete with pics of you and the outfits!

    Blessings,

    Ava
    xox

    • I just imagine feeling that crust after a long day… opening it up and find a dry spot. Yuck!
      My knight came up with some comment about “classy” people using hankies!!! Can you actually believe that. Apparently that is why my father and grandfather never used them?!?
      Thanks Ava. (And thanks for your twitter move, that was awesome!)
      xx

      • my pleasure! Just want you to get plenty of Tweets. Mr. Bricks just got a twitter account. his s/n is mrbrick (note no s on the end)

        Blessings,

        Ava
        xox

  10. Too funny of a story!!! I wouldn’t want snot to have legs of a frog, then you’d never catch it! (Erase Erase Erase) Happy Wednesday!

    • Funny- but terribly disgusting! (between you and i- i had to read your comment a few times to actually get what you were trying to say!
      Happy Thursday right back!!!
      xx

  11. hilarious! fun. thanks for taking us there w u, snot! (ok. not as funny this time.)

    • Thanks for popping in….. I do try- but sometimes i think i loose the plot!
      Think it will be far funnier when i read teh post again in a couple of years!
      xx

  12. […] yesterday’s post, and all the excitement that the snotty frog, sorry “snot” and “frog”, […]

  13. My father used to do that thing with the hankies and even as a small child, I ran screaming from the room from them. Great post!

    • Clearly you are not classy! Haha.
      Thanks girl!
      xx

  14. Oh my, that’s a post!
    What is it with those ‘air-fresheners’ ( I use the term loosely) – you’re so right, they do make things smell worse.

    • Haha. I felt like a got a lot off my chest that day!
      About the air fresheners- I smell that smell on people often, as if they sat in the bathrrom and sprayed endlessly, and the air particles landed on them and stuck. I always wonder if i should even brave the cubicle after that.
      I always wait!
      xx


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