Posted by: The Saffa Mom | January 11, 2011

If I could keep your nerves all wrapped inside of my tummy forever- I would!

Yesterday was a very up-down-up-down day!

When I really sit and think hard about it- I could blame it on PMS!!! (That sounds so lame.) This past year I have noticed that my metabolism has slowed down drastically, and my Premenstrual Stress has increased at a rapid pace with a vengeance for the last 16 years. My body is finding balance!

But now into a story….. (what you really came here for).

Yesterday was My Princess’s first day at a new school. A REAL Nursery School. I think she was super excited…. I (on the other hand) had butterflies driving her there. I asked her if she was nervous and she said no. The closer I got, the stronger I felt my heart beating.

Why, oh why? It is not as if she has never been to school. She has been going to a Day Care since she was 3 months old (She is now 4). Every day. For most of the day. At first that was a little traumatic for me, but it didn’t take long and I fell in love with her being there.

So here we are outside her New Nursery School, and I am more nervous than she is!

I walked in and was completely overwhelmed. She followed suit, and my talkative butterfly was suddenly a little shy. The teachers came to save the day. All so welcoming, and got her into a groove quickly. Found a cubicle for her things, and walked mom to the door, with a few REALLY tight hugs and kisses, and “I love yous”.

I had a chat to her dad outside (EX), conveniently his step daughter has been going to the same school for the past year. A thought arises, “what if the teachers give him more information than they do me? He and he’s misses have been building a relationship with these teachers for an entire year- before me. Oh no. STOP. Let me not jump the gun now!”

Driving away, I honestly had tears swell up in my eyes. What is going on? I don’t cry!!!! Well, apparently I NOW do! I composed myself and called my knight to fill him in…… and then the tears all came again, and my voice changed…. you know that sound when you are about to sob. Need to end this call, he can’t know I am about to cry! Shoo wee- my knight will think I have become a sissy.

Throughout the day I do think about My Princess. I wander if she is fitting in and making friends. If she will like her teacher? If she will eat lunch? Consolation- she always has her step sister….mmmmmm, don’t know if that is actually a good thing? To be completely honest- I think her step sister is a brat! Perhaps I am being a little harsh?

Day moves through it’s motions and 4:30 arrives. My Princess has been picked up by her dad, and he has brought her to my office…… No bag? Another boy has taken it, by accident… apparently they are the same colour and he doesn’t know the difference between a violin (her cubicle) and a piano (his cubicle). Typical boy hey?

She is scruffy, and her dad comments that I am going to end up having to wash her hair every night. I don’t take it too seriously, at this stage I haven’t actually seen the reason for his comment. I greet her with a hug, and realise that her hair has sand in it. No comment. Only once her dad leaves do I actually look at what I am going to have to deal with.

Okay this is not a little bit of sand. In fact, it is the entire sand pit! It is embedded into her scalp, there is just so much!

Filled with a bit of frustration and anger, I ask her “wtf?” Well, not in those words…. in kiddie-friendlyjargon.  She then fills me in that her (evil) step sister did this to her. “Did you do the same to her?” “No mama, she just put sand in MY hair.” I cannot hold off the communication, and send a snotty text to EX, explaining My Princess’s explanation. I am sure he sensed my irritation.

I ended up washing her hair 3 times, in the swimming pool!!! I also stated over and over again, in all my frustration, that if this happens again- I am cutting her bum-length beautiful hair off! Period! She also needs to take some responsibility. I realise that she is only 4, but under no circumstances am I washing her hair three times every single night! Period!

(Maybe I really was suffering from PMS.)

Picture from

She had a rough night last night, obviously the day had been quite stimulating. Every half hour she moaned or cried, until after 12. I would comfort her, make sure she was sleeping and just give her the security that she was craving. (I don’t know how I could go through having a baby all over again!) Then one of the comments, while the tears were flowing was, “mama, I don’t want you to cut my hair. Please don’t cut my hair.” My heart shattered. “I won’t cut your hair my baby, don’t worry. Your hair can stay long. I love you. Now let’s try and get back to sleep.”

For a split second I felt like an evil mom…… but only a split second.



  1. Maybe have a quiet word with one of the teachers and explain what happened and ask her to keep an eye on the playground. Best not to get the Ex’s back up yet, may backfire on your little one?

    • Ummm, probably a bit late for that! Perhaps i should have posted this when i was trying to vent off some steam. I just wanted him to realise that it is NOT OKAY. Next time maybe i will take a step black, and post first! Haha.
      I did have a word with the teachers this morning, and I think they understood that i may be one of those pedantic moms!!

  2. And how was your night last night? Did you manage to sleep ok? First day at a new school is also a big deal for moms, don’t forget that. Glad you’re not going to cut your daughter’s hair!
    Sunshine xx

    • Sunshine- you back!! Yah!!! What’s happened?
      I had an absolutely awful night BUT it really was all Logan. I think she was over stimulated yesterday, she woke every half an hour until after 1… fact i dont even know if she was actually awake. But she was moaning and crying, and just could not get happy. And me being me- will never leave her in that state. So every moan- up i get……. felt liek i was breast feeding again. Haha.

  3. I am a teacher of 4 year olds. Teach princess to tell step sister to back off with a pat phrase like ” stop! I don’t like it when you do that” then tell the teacher the situation. I know you may not want to share to much, but the more we know, the easier our job is.
    He is your EX for a reason. I doubt he will be all that empathetic because he likely thinks it cute the girls “play together”
    Men are over rated lol

    • Ed- I didn’t know that! How do you do it? I think that i would probably hav eto move into a nut house if i had to take charge of 15 x 4 year olds. My hat goes off to you… over and over! Feel like we just another step closer.
      Will take your advice. You correct on all fronts- especially the bit about men being over rated!! 🙂

  4. Oh my. That’s a first day for you. I imagine your Princess will find new people to mix with over the next few weeks. She probably drifted to her step-sister as a familiar face in a new setting. Hope all goes better today.

    • I think it did…. She sleeps at her dad’s house on a Tuesday night, and it is difficult to get a 4 year old to give you a detailed run down over the phone. But yes, she is quite sociable- so i hope she finds a nice mix.

  5. PS I’m so pleased you’re the kind of Mum who would comfort her child at night instead of growling!

    • I always try to see a bigger picture. Thanks for the vote of confidence.

  6. at risk of jumping in here into what may become a serious man bashing event, I just have one thing to say………… I do know the difference between a violin and a piano! 🙂

    Sorry day one was such a challenge… it will get better, I speak from experience.

    • Hahahahaha!!!! Please man, you are one of the girls. (That is why you knowthe difference ;-))
      Thanks for the thumbs up. I agree, it will get better.

  7. It’s sad that bullying starts at such a young age. I see it too. When Big Brother was in a day care (school) he often was crying when I arrived to pick him up. He has lost his top teeth because of an undocumented incident at the facility. Argh! Nobody, including the owner, would take responsibility for what happened.

    Now I have an angel of a nanny watching both kiddos while I’m at work.

    The schools are good for grooming kids for kindergarten and beyond, teaching them to sit, listen and play. The idle mind is the devil’s playground….

    • I would have flipped! So good that you remained calm-ish?
      Scary- but you completely correct about the idle mind….

  8. […] She does not really have a choice in the matter, and so- yes- she goes to school. Keep in mind, it is all a new thing and I am positive that over the next few weeks, her mindset will change and she will become excited […]

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