Posted by: The Saffa Mom | December 28, 2010

Dear Father Christmas, this was not on my list?

Dear Father Christmas,

I know that the last time I wrote to you was about 24 years ago, and clearly now realize that this has become an issue to you (you must know why I say that. Do you really need a letter?) I thought that since you could “see all” that was happening, you would see that throughout the year- I have worked my butt off to be a good person.

It has taken me days to put this letter together, because in truth I dont want to upset you.

Perhaps I should be very grateful for the gifts that you presented me with, (and of course find the positives…) but can you at least think about where I am coming from.  

1. A bicycle.



 I realise that I may have mentioned riding one on my recently done Bucket List, however I don’t think at any point I imagined having one, and so soon!

In fact, a couple of days before Christmas, while my knight was giving me some clues- he stated that “he cannot wrap my gift, as I would know what it was- anyway”. (He is a very lazy wrapper! In fact, I don’t think he has ever wrapped a single thing in the three years we have been together.) Days before that he had said it was something specifically for outdoors. Two clues. (Not a Land Rover!!)

At that point I guessed a bicycle, and then expressly stated that if that was the case “my heart would be broken”. I even stated that it was days before Christmas, and the gift (if it was a bicycle) could still be exchanged. I told him in “no funny words, or chick lingo” that I did not want a bicycle. Please take it back, and change it…..for anything.  

Do you think I was then surprised when my knight led me to my study on Christmas morning, and low-and-behold presented me with (here is the surprise) a bicycle? More specifically a mountain bike.  

I was heartbroken. I just stood there. I am sure the tears may have swelled up, but cant remember much from that specific moment.  

I would have loved books, clothes, jewellery, or a land rover, OR even better- a freaking ipad!!!  BUT, NO!!! I could think of a million things that I would rather have. BUT, NO!!

My gift was really not about what I wanted, but rather about what you perhaps wanted to give me. (Apparently, it was for everyone around me, and not just for me).

SO, for now I will entertain it. I will learn to get back onto a bicycle, since it really has been approximately 15 years since I last rode one, and perhaps get some leisurely exercise in. It may end up being a good thing. HOWEVER, I just want you to know that it was not what I wanted!

(Perhaps next year I will think about giving you a volume of books (since you don’t read) on cooking, cleaning and baking (since you have elves to do all of that for you to), for the good of all around you).

2. A mother who had a meltdown minutes after all our guests arrived for Christmas Lunch.

I realise that this year has been a tough one for my entire family. A year ago my father found left for a new blondie to keep his heart afloat. Possibly the most traumatic experience of my life. Through the year I learned to be a pillar of strength for my mom, as I tried to salvage what little was left of our family structure. My gran was battling through the months with cancer. For all the prayer in the world, God still wanted her more up with him then with us. So did you see it necessary to test my patience once again?

My gift- disguised as my mom, had been drinking peach schnapps the entire morning before she arrived. (Did you know that you can’t really smell peach schnapps on a person?) Let me add, that the peach schnapps was not the only enemy! My mom is on serious Anti-depressants (I wouldn’t know what was serious and what wasn’t), and therefore should not be drinking to begin with.

Not being big drinkers, it did not even occur to me that my mom may ALREADY be plastered. Drinking Christmas morning? Oh please, never.  

She was perfectly packaged, and as she unwrapped and our guests arrived, she ended up being the “coal” that I perhaps should have received for all my “bad” through the years. (Is that why it happened?)

To be quite honest, I thought the stitches that I had to rush my princess for on Monday night, before Christmas, were a great patience tester……was it necessary to push those boundaries anymore?

My mom could not walk, talk, or even see straight. She curled up into a ball in a corner, and cried her eyes out! (I could have done with more emergency trips to casualty for stiches better.)

What had she had to drink? According to me- half a cooler.

Oh wait, not that I really think about it- perhaps my gift was actually her friend? Was it? She took my mother through the motions of the afternoon, she looked after her, she made sure that she had something to eat, and she consoled her. 

So for now, I would feel better in knowing that my gift was actually her friend, who came to save the day. HOWEVER, I just want you to know it was not what I wanted! None of that.

(Perhaps next year we can look at having a normal family once again, one like I had two years ago? Can we put that on a list? )   

 3. A scent diffuser, a snow-globe, and a Christina Aguilera perfume?

They all quite precious, I don’t really mind any of them BUT no butterflies in my tummy.

The simple fact is that I would really like to have that awesome excitement that you gave me as a child when I opened my gifts! The smile that could not cease. Can we perhaps try and find that again?   

I realise that it may seem as if I am a spoilt brat, but it is really more than that. I just know exactly what I want!

I know you understand,

All my love,





  1. Ouchie, my girl has a scar on exactly the same place under her chin.
    Give the bike back, cycling gives you massive legs.
    Can’t say anything about your mom, ouch!

    • More worried about the massive bum…..already headed in that direction!! My knight claims that the bum is where the power comes from!!! HAHA!!! If i send the bike back, i may need to worry about more then my mom having a meltdown. No need to say anything about my mom, dont think there is much to be said….but thanks anyway! xx

  2. Wow, I don’t know what to say about your mom’s situation, but I too recognized those stitches under the chin. My son had 5 of them in that spot when he was about 6 years old. Still has a little scar now at the age of 17. Best wishes for a calm, sane 2011!

    • It is crazy, but i think everyone i have spoken to seems to have had them or knows someone very close that has!!! I have a scar too. Made teh whole experience a little more comforting for my princess…… “look my babe- mom and logan are now the same!!!” Thanks for popping by!!! xx

  3. Oh wow…in the words of my Ninny…. When it rains it pours …but hang in there kiddo and return the bike 😉 xoxo

    • Returning the bike would be like returning a new baby sister!!! Serious! Haha. Thanks for visiting!!! Xx

  4. Awww hugs!! I can relate to all of this. Drama always seems to culminate around the holidays. Hopefully 2011 will be a better year for you.

    • Thanks Holly. I think itcan only be a better year! Perhaps i will get what i want this time…. xx

  5. Sending big hugs to you from this chilly city. Strength to you, and to your mom.
    Sunshine xx

    • I have you guys….I am strong! This year has been a good year for learning all about patience, and endurance. (It has also given me alot to blog about- haha!) Thanks Sunshine.

  6. […] is the 26th of December. We all starting to feel very well rested after a serious Christmas Day. House has been cleaned, and we back into an evening […]

  7. […] which I was never enthusiastic about having…… in fact, I NEVER actually wanted! (See the post about that here.) My knights bicycles have their own room, our guest bedroom!! The bed gets covered in all his tools […]

  8. […] The entire afternoon I worried. I was anxious, in a state. I just did not want my baby girl having to deal with so much trauma. (She had stitches a few days before Christmas, that was hectic enough.) […]

  9. […] Friday afternoon I committed to the idea that on Saturday I would go for a ride (2nd serious one) on my new bicycle…… my Christmas Present- that I NEVER ever wanted!  […]

  10. […] even if it wasn’t) , or how Christmas was (You bound to say “good”, even if you had my Christmas), or in fact, how much weight you have put on (we all do- deal with it). I don’t care that […]

  11. […] so many cyclists. I would have looked like a “nana” on my ———mountain bike (Christmas present i never wanted) – but I think it would have been […]

  12. […] those of you who have been avid blog followers you would remember that last year was possibly the worst Christmas I ever had to endear. I didn’t think that things could get lower. I being super positive did my utmost to make it […]

  13. […] i rode my bicycle (the famous one), and today i did a 40 minute walk. I don’t think a walk qualifies as […]

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