Posted by: The Saffa Mom | December 22, 2010

Before I kick the Bucket…..

Taken from

On Monday night, one of my best friends (in the whole wide world), left half way across it.

Could her ticket have been booked for a worse time? She landed at Heathrow (only flight out of SA for that International Airport), and all just for her connecting flight. (Perhaps that was a sign?)

And then she camped, on the floor……. in the freezing cold dirt. With really crappy, expensive coffee. I have yet to hear whether she has actually left Heathrow for FINAL destination or not? Where is FINAL destination? Canada!!! Montreal to be more specific.

I never really thought about it until she was telling her story (or her potential story) to friends of ours, and they turned around and said they have friends in Toronto, made me think of Ed………. (here is her post)………Still makes me laugh!!! I then realized how big Canada actually is!! It could probably be compared in size to Africa? Yes, the entire continent!!! (Please correct me if I am wrong? Any Canadians reading this?)

Her story is one of love…..yah!!!! (My tone is one of ENVY). She has ditched her career, to fly to a man who is working in the little “Frenchy” Town, for four months, and discover if he could potentially be the one!! Yes- THE one!! (Should I add a note about the fact that that she met him over a two week period a couple of months ago, after he had planned his trip back home to Australia…He did fly her over there for two weeks, and they had an awesome holiday (perhaps a month ago), and now she has just left on her next trip!!!) AHHHHH!!!! (ENVY all over again!) While she is there, she is going to use her free time to study Social Development (what could Africa need anymore?), and hopefully fall head over heels in love? If he is the one- there is a whole new mountain to climb….  he is Australian, and he has a working contract in Canada for two years. South Africa does not feel a part of his big picture?!?!

Through this whole emotional experience- yes for me…. I may never see my best friend again….. (okay maybe a slight exaggeration), I realised that I would never do that.

More Specifically: I would never get on a plane and move country for a man with no security or definite future planned.

Don’t get me wrong, I would love to be able to do something like that. (I WISH I COULD!!!) It sounds absolutely awesome, pie in the sky, romance. It could potentially be a movie!!! BUT I CAN’T DO IT!!!

Why? Well, I have a princess who is four years old, and who’s father would probably have me up on kidnapping charges if I dragged his daughter ANYWHERE out of the border (Even if it was for her own good!!!) Secondly, I have a man that I am committed to……who unfortunately is not a romantic, and thinks that Valentine’s day is a commercial fiasco, but who I still love (Knight- do you want to do some role playing….half way across the world?) Thirdly, I don’t have the money- especially to take 4 months- yes 4 months off!!! In fact, I could think of a few MORE reasons why I could never actually do it!! All very depressing actually…..

I then realised (I am falling into a never ending spiral of pessimism here…help!) that there are so many MORE things that I would NEVER actually do, but may have crossed my mind on more than one occasion.


  1. Ballet dancing. Have you seen what those girls can do? I don’t think 29 would be a good age to start stretching your body in those ways….
  2. Having three kids before I am 30…. I am 29, 30 in a month exactly, and have one. Potentially I have a feeling that I may never want any more! ANY more!
  3. Lastly- meeting, falling head over heels in love with and then Marrying Brad Pitt, and having his three babies before 30…. to be quite honest, he just may want too many kids for my liking!

But now my story…….. the bit where I turn the negative into positive!!!! The reason why you have come!!!!

It is getting closer to the day (the day) that everyone says: “what’s your New Year’s resolution?”……. small talk….  I never ever (ever) make any!!! Why? Everyone around me basically sets themselves up for failure. Like losing half of their current body weight????? Or becoming a gourmet cook, when they can’t boil water!!!  Or turning into a vegetarian- why would you even want to? Hardly anyone I know actually does what they said they would. So what is the point people? Something to talk about on New Year’s Day? Okay- maybe I am being a little harsh.

I decided that instead of a New year’s Resolution, I would start a “bucket list”. A bucket list? What is that? (My knight’s response……..but you may all be a little more well read?)

I googled for a definition, and this is what I found, (Urban Dictionary):

“A list of things to do before you die. Comes from the term “kicked  the bucket”.

Another definition that I found had me in hysterics:

1. A really bad movie where a lot of money was wasted on unnecessary CG work that is unconvincing and you can tell the actors were in front of green screens during most of the shoot.

2. A list of things you think you might need to accomplish because you feel your own mortality closing the door on you.

3. You feel insecure about your life and therefore make a list of things to get busy on.

4. A list of hottie‘s, MILF‘s and other strangers that you always had your eye on and you most now go conquer.

My picture:

A “whole-life-ahead-list” of accomplishments and goals (not yet done) that I could add to (which I will be doing), or delete (because some may prove to be very unrealistic or in fact impossible, like having 3 kids before 30). Then….. ACTUALLY marking off each item when/as I get it done.

I am actually excited at the thought!!! In fact, I have decided that it will be a part of my blog. A page dedicated to it!!

(While working on this, I realised that it is a little harder to actually do.…. we forget everything, we file it incorrectly, and when we need it- well- it seems to be gone. Therefore- See Number 81.  I battled to get to a 100, in fact you will see I didn’t make it. We will need to call it work in action!!!)   

 My Bucket List- December 2010

1. Run a 10km Marathon- if you can call it that (The only place I have ever run is on a treadmill….. and my  distance achieved was probably 4.5 kms, so you can now understand 10kms. To add to that- I have not been on that treadmill for 8 months!!)

2. Learn archery (Hunter instinct coming out)

3.Learn to play golf (I have clubs, and visited the driving range before falling pregnant. That was the end)

4. Then play golf on every continent (That would mean visiting every continent!!)

5. Ski (on snow. Real snow)

6. Take horseback riding lessons (I did this as a kid, and now living in the country I see so many beautiful horses and just imagine riding bare backed into the mountains)

7. Learn to water ski (I tried this, and was bad. Became so embarrassed that I didn’t try again)nLearn to pilot a boat instead. (Serious advice taken.)

8. Learn to sail (What can I possibly say to explain that? It looks breath taking!)

9. Learn to play an instrument (Any one, not fussy.)

10.  Ride in a hot air balloon (My knight will not join me on this one, in fact I may battle to get him to agree…… he thinks that it could possibly be very dangerous since you don’t have MUCH control when you up there. I don’t care…..)

11.  Go paragliding (Feel the wind beneath my wings!!!)

12.  Parasail (Could you imagine the possible view of all those hotties on the beach?) 

13.  Sky dive (Okay, so yes, more sky stuff… you getting bored?)

14.  Go on a helicopter ride (My knight is supposedly a helicopter pilot????)

15.  Swim with sharks (I want to feel that fear.)

16.  Ride a mechanical bull (A challange?)

17.  Go fire walking (I have seen photos of people doing this, and to have so much control over your body must feel VERY rewarding!!)

18.  Bunjee jump (I have been king swinging, and that was awesome)

19.  Learn to fly a plane (More control- in the sky)(Just to add a small note about all this sky stuff, I actually have a tattoo of an eagle on my lower back….. when I made that decision it wasn’t about flying)

20.  Go jet skiing (A motor bike on water!!!)

21.  Cruise to the arctic (A cruise to the Caribbean was one of my most amazing holiday experiences. Could you imagine seeing that ice? And feeling that cold?)

22.  Go on a cross country motorcycle trip (First I would need a bike so see number 23.)

23.  Own a motorcycle. (Perhaps a Harley Davidson)

24.  See the Grand Canyon

25.  Visit Victoria Falls

26.  See the Northern lights

27.  The Perito Moreno Glacier

28.  St Peter’s Basilica, the Vatican, Rome

29.  The pyramids of Giza, Egypt

30.  See Stone henge, United Kingdom (I lived in London for a year…and went hardly anywhere)

31.  The Sydney Opera House, Australia

32.  The Great Wall of China

33.  The Brazilian Carnival, Rio De Janiero

34.  The leaning tower of Pisa

35.  The Eiffel Tower

36.  Live in a foreign country for 6 months (When I thought of this, I thought this may be impossible. BUT THEN I realised that my bucket list is a “life long list”, so in fact when I am old and grey- I may be able to do this!!)

37.  Visit the Caribbean AGAIN, and go island hopping

38.  Take up photography

39.  Write a book (Starting with a blog!)

40.  Learn to sculpt

41.  Fly  a huge kite (I know how huge- huge is.)

42.  Make a mobile (Just to say I did.)

43.  Drive a 20 year old car (A red MG cabriolet!!! Wind in my hair. In actual fact, I would like it to be mine.)

44.  Read every novel that has won a Pulitzer prize in the Fiction Category (I love reading.)

45.  Watch every movie that has won an academy award for best picture

46.  Have a happiness project (Starting with that Next year- 2011…watch this space)

47.  Be Time Magazine’s person of the year (HAHA….this may need to be deleted, but for now- let’s leave it on)

48.  Make the front page of a newspaper (Hopefully for something good, although when does good news make the front page?)

49.  Donate a million rand to a charity (I may need to start counting all the change I can currently give- towards that for now.)

50.  Volunteer at a children’s home (I have once asked for the forms, and when I needed to actually get my butt into gear and commit and send them in- I didn’t have the time. How lame!!!)

51.  Write a Children’s book (and do the pictures myself!)

52.  Write a cook book (with the help of Midnite Chef perhaps?)

53.  Have a white Christmas (Oh that would be so precious!!!)

54.  Charter a yacht (That would cost so money!!)

55.  Own a beach house (That may cost more money!!! But I would want it in the middle of no- where…..the country on the beach. No neighbours for miles…..)

56.  Drive a red Ferrari (Just because…)

57.  Sleep in a castle (Even if it is not a Royal one… I have visited Buckingham Palace before- but sleeping in one may be very different.)

58.  Invent a board game

59.  Make a documentary film

60.  Sell art- mine!!! (Perhaps one of this sculptures that I do from Number 40.)

61.  Become a life coach (One day I am sure I could give someone some sound advice on finding themselves…perhaps that means that I need to find myself first?)

62.  Submit a clip to YOU TUBE (Okay- this I can do soon soon!! Will need to register I am sure first?)

63.  Create a trust fund for my child

64.  Mush a dog sled

65.  Watch turtles hatch and run for the ocean

66.  Go whale watching (I can do that in SA!!)

67.  Swim with dolphins (Perhaps in Mozambique? I always wanted to be a Marine Biologist, didn’t make that!!!)

68.  Visit the San Diego Zoo (I had a Computer programme growing up- long before we had the internet. I was blown away… I hope it would not be disappointing.)

69.  See gorillas in the wild

70.  Design my own home

71.  Grow a herb garden (I need to get cracking- now that we live in the country!)

72.  A vegetable patch (Same as not above…. I clearly am being very lazy!! Or very suburban!!)

73.  Have a library- filled with books (A real wooden one, with a ladder!!! And thousands of books.)

74.  Have a bonsai tree (This could also be short term. I was first going to say- grow one. Then I realised that I have two pot plants currently. Officially they have been my only plants ever!!! So perhaps starting one from scratch would be a little unrealistic?)

75.  Become a collector (Shoes, and books already on the list. But I am thinking of something special…… I know what. Choc cows!!! This is an amazing initiative, and considering that cancer is so close to my heart- it would be something that I could feel passionate about.)

76.  Attend a pilates class (There is a studio literally 500 metres away….this would be my lazy self attending this post.)

77.  Attend an Olympics gathering.

78.  Be in Times Square on New Years Eve!!!

79.  Make Baklava (I love Greek food period!)

80.  Make a gingerbread house (This year I wanted to start on Gingerbread man- failed miserably at that. But it is not Christmas yet- so I may still get that right!!!)

81.  Do a memory course (To help me with lists like this!!!)

82.  Get a licence to shoot a gun (And the gun with it!!! Hunter instinct again!)

83.  Teach a class of kids (I do believe that education is the foundation to everything, and the “lack of” is the reason we have so many serious problems in this world today. I would like to be a part of that.)

84.  Find an app for my phone…..for this bucket list!!! (As anyone knows by now, everything I love finds a way to my Blackberry)

85.  Any suggestions……?

I need 16 more at least!!!! Perhaps you could inspire me!!!

THEN I challenge you to start your own, before the New year.



  1. That’s a pretty impressive list. I can’t think of 85 things I haven’t done that I would like to do. I could probably name 85 places I would like to go, though.

    I think if you go to half of them, it would be a busy schedule.


    • And i thought the fact that i had not reached 100 was a serious issue! Those places would be a part of your bucket list. Yu shoudl really out them all down and perhaps start? Think that is a plan. x

      • Thanks for the reply.

        I actually placed the number of places I’d like to go at 85 because that is where you stopped. The real number is only 1 but it is a big 1 to be sure.

        The one place I want to go…is everywhere I have never been. That includes London, Paris, New York, Tokyo and the Moon. Back home in good ole’ Kentukcy it includes the Shaker Museum, the Octogan Hall, and Boone National Forest.

        If it is there, I want to see it.

  2. Woooop! Woooop! I’m Canadian AND I read this! Thanks for the shout out! I have owned a musher dog and been in a sled race! That was when I lived in the Arctic. I was 6 and it was cold. I have Heli Skied! That knocks off 2 items. To your list I would add see the Grand Canyon and Ayres Rock. But your list is awesome!

    • I am jealous already!! No envious. I am quite chuffed with this little project. Will add those right now, although, excuse my ignorance- what or where is Ayres Rock? xx

      • I guess it’s called Uluru now. It is a giant rock that rises out of the desert in Australia. It is close to Alice Springs. It is hotter then the sun- but you being from SA may be use to that! 🙂

        • That sounds awesome! Going to do some googling!!!
          If i get to Canada- what should i add?

  3. That is quite some list, Honey, take my advice and scrap the water ski bit; it’s just like an enema, but it happens in public.

    • I actually think you may be right!!!! (To be honest, i put it on there because my knight can water ski like a pro…..) Perhaps i will replace it with learn to pilot a boat, and then i have a function during those times!!! I think that is a plan.

  4. What a great list … I’m sure you’ll find your next 16 in good time. You have your whole life to do al these and, you know what, my husband are “old and grey” and living a whole new adventure, so it’s never too late!
    Cindy – you’re hilarious! Skiing can be like an enema, but it doesn’t have to be! The joy of getting to stand up and speed over the water, is just awesome!
    Merry Christmas, sweet mnb!
    Sunshine xx

    • Ah thanks sunshine. Yes, was thinking about my potential adventures later on!!! Now- do I put water skiing back on or not? Haha! Xx

  5. Wow! You have a traveling adventurer philanthropist spirit! It is all such a tell, eh? I have a friend who refers to hers as her “bliss list” – and I’ve been threatening to do one. I wonder why I haven’t? That in itself is a tell….

    I didn’t see climb a mountain? Not like climb with ropes and stuff, but what about a nice steep hike?

    Other than that, I think you have it covered! And, yes, when you come to the SD Zoo and swim with the dolphins, you’ll have to come up the coast and we can cycle through a vineyard 😉

    • That sounds stunning……by then I should know be riding once again!! Haha. Hike? Ummmm….. Perhaps. Will need to think about that one.
      Have an awesome christmas.

  6. […] realise that I may have mentioned riding one on my recently done Bucket List, however I don’t think at any point I imagined having one, and so […]

  7. […] managed to find her way back to Canada because of a boy that she has fallen hopelessly in love with. (I have mentioned her before……) It is a precious story that has turned horribly wrong. Her recent plan was to join him for the […]

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